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Let me get this straight first; this is not a question of if the car is manly enough for you, but a question of if you are manly enough for the car. This car makes a steak covered in a sauce made of melted-down bullets look like it is in the middle of its menstruation cycle. If Chuck Norris were to look upon this car, he would cry tears of pure gold. Are you saying you are up to the challenge of driving it?
The ceramic brakes have been finely integrated with the steering in order to make you dance around corners at the speed of sound. Well, I say the speed of sound; what I actually mean is 218 mph, but that's so fast, it might as well be the speed of sound, right?
...Right?
Anyway, the car has special roll-bars have been added to ease up the crashes a bit and a built-in computer, as well as an integrated wireless phone and SatNav, and seats that have been called, and I quote, "Pretty comfy, actually" by our finest seat testers. It even has the rarest of features, a radio. I bet that not many cars can boast THAT now, can they?
And you still think you are man enough to drive this steaming pile of magnificence?
This car has been judged by only the best car critics in the land. They said to us that this car was one of the best that has ever been made and possibly ever will be made and that their love for this car could not be described in mere words, as they are too meagre for what they wish to express.
Though not in those exact words, obviously.
This car is truly a monument in history; it is a landmark moment for the human race as a whole. I'd compare this to the Concorde, but the Concorde didn't come with a one year guarantee and the latest in high-tech suspension for easy road-going.
And it only costs £150,000.
Now, are you going to buy this car or what?
The ceramic brakes have been finely integrated with the steering in order to make you dance around corners at the speed of sound. Well, I say the speed of sound; what I actually mean is 218 mph, but that's so fast, it might as well be the speed of sound, right?
...Right?
Anyway, the car has special roll-bars have been added to ease up the crashes a bit and a built-in computer, as well as an integrated wireless phone and SatNav, and seats that have been called, and I quote, "Pretty comfy, actually" by our finest seat testers. It even has the rarest of features, a radio. I bet that not many cars can boast THAT now, can they?
And you still think you are man enough to drive this steaming pile of magnificence?
This car has been judged by only the best car critics in the land. They said to us that this car was one of the best that has ever been made and possibly ever will be made and that their love for this car could not be described in mere words, as they are too meagre for what they wish to express.
Though not in those exact words, obviously.
This car is truly a monument in history; it is a landmark moment for the human race as a whole. I'd compare this to the Concorde, but the Concorde didn't come with a one year guarantee and the latest in high-tech suspension for easy road-going.
And it only costs £150,000.
Now, are you going to buy this car or what?
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This is part of what I had to write for my English EoY exam. I decided to make it silly, 'cos you only live once.
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"If Chuck Norris were to look upon this car, he would cry tears of pure gold." <-- FTW